When I first saw the trailer for the movie Bad Moms I was skeptical to say the least. “What kind of nonsense is Hollywood about to inflict on us mothers?” was my first thought. However, on opening night I was there, in line holding my lightly buttered popcorn, standing alongside a group of other moms eager to see what Hollywoood had to say.
I don’t think it’ll win best picture anytime soon but I did walk away with a few nuggets I’ll share:
Stop trying to do it all…at once. You’ll end up stressed out, unhealthy and disconnected. You’re only one person with 24 hours in your day and a large chunk of that is hopefully spent sleeping. Some days you’ll hit your target and some days you won’t. That’s life. Running yourself ragged and beating yourself up for not being all things to all people all the time, isn’t serving you or anyone else. Let yourself off the hook once in a while.
Nobody’s perfect. Forget about being the perfect mom. There’s no such thing. Striving for perfection keeps you living in the past and the future. Instead aim to be more present, grounded and connected now. Be more graceful with yourself. Accept that you’re doing the best you can with what you know and have.
Stay connected. It’s things like multitasking and overscheduling that can lead to feelings of disconnection over time. Look for ways to simplify your family’s schedule, use apps to help save time, engage your spouse and kids in more of the household chores and find simple yet impactful ways to let the people in your life know they’re loved, seen and appreciated.
Remember to have fun. When was the last time you actually played? We get so busy with work and raising kids that it easy to forget that we’re supposed to be enjoying ourselves in this life. Set an intention to increase your level of play. Then choose an activity (start with something simple) that brings you absolute joy. Play is not only good for your mental and physical health, it’s also a reminder of what’s important in life.
Please feel free to reach out to me if you have any questions about how to better integrate your work-family-personal life.
Akanke Adefunmi helps professional women shift from stress to success in their work-family-personal life. You are always invited to attend one of her free work-family-self balance webinars or join her monthly Working Moms Virtual Retreat. Follow her on Twitter, @Akanke_Adefunmi, Like her Facebook page, facebook.com/claimyourshero