Yes, it’s that time of year again – looking back at another year of life, what worked for you and what didn’t.

It sounds old-school, but I love this time of year for checking-in with myself. Starting the new year fresh with new eyes and great plans!

So, let’s do it …Are you seeing the results in your home life and career that you want to have? That could mean feeling stress-free and grounded as you move throughout your day, having enough time for the people you love and yourself, or maybe it means having a career that’s fulfilling and doing work that makes a difference in the world.

If so, that’s awesome! If not, it may be time to STOP with the same-ole-same-ole – to change your mind about some things.

Here’s the thing: If you want things to be different, you must do something different. Old ways won’t open new doors. And as you know, when you change your mind, well sister, everything else shifts too. 

When you’re having your morning coffee or taking a break at work, what thoughts go through your mind? Maybe it goes like this …

Let’s see, what’s next on my list? I’ve gotta make that dentist appointment before my meeting … oh, I gotta finish up the meeting agenda …  wonder what I’m going to make for dinner tonight … there isn’t even milk in the fridge … now I’m gonna miss my workout to go to the grocery store and by the time I get free from work the traffic will be nasty … ugh, and I have to make those brownies for the bake sale … and the monthly report is due tomorrow … why do I have to do everything myself … this is insane … I’m so fricking frustrated …

Now you’re going down that rabbit hole and feel sick in the pit of your stomach.

Let me ask you this sister: Is there something better that you could be thinking about? Could life be telling you that something needs to change?

That’s what my mentor asked me one day when I told her how unhappy I was feeling, and how frustrated I was with how things were playing out in my life.

It was a time when I felt like I was juggling so many balls – at work, at home, in my community, for my husband, for my kids, for everybody else but me – and it was ALL ON ME! (Yes, I was feeling really sorry for myself…). I was busy with being busy, but in truth was feeling swept away by all the things fighting for my attention every day, being pulled in many directions at once, and getting lost in negative thinking and overwhelm.

That was not the way I wanted to be nor live my life. In a way life was forcing me to update my thinking and approach things differently. Which included discovering what I needed and truly wanted MORE of in my work and personal life, and uncovering what was blocking me from having that.

So as you begin to close out this year, spending relaxed time with your family and friends, take some moments to daydream and ask yourself:

  • What do you want MORE of in your life, whether it’s in your career, home life, relationships, health and wellness?
  • What do you need to take responsibility for in order to have what you desire?

And…be kind to yourself. What you’re experiencing is what so many other smart career women like yourself are going through or have gone through (I’ve been there, so no judgment here!). What you know now that they don’t is you can approach things differently and have the flourishing career and home life you’ve dreamed of.

So, sister, have fun daydreaming about what you want in the new year and play with the possibilities of change in your thinking!

Wishing you an easy and intentional transition into 2018!

Your partner in life design,


“I stay focused on the fact that this is my life and I get to make choices that are right for me—choices that make me happy.” –Stacey


Follow Akanke on Twitter, @Akanke_Adefunmi, Like her Facebook page,

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